Kick HR to the Curb

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You hate HR?

Me too.

Here are some simple ways to keep Human Resources outta your business.

• Don’t say racist things.
• Don’t be sexist.
• Quit the homophobia.
• Dress like an adult at the office—not a stripper.
• Don’t smell.
• Have some ethics.
• When you hire someone, make sure that person is qualified.
• Don’t hire unqualified relatives, friends, and mistresses.
• Give your employees an opportunity to do something great.
• When you go through an RFP process, don’t write the RFP so that the company hires your friends.
• Don’t steal.
• Don’t cheat.
• Don’t underpay your employees.
• Don’t overpay your executives.
• When you recognize and reward employees, do it fairly.
• Stop demanding mafia-like loyalty from your employees.
• Don’t yell.
• Don’t berate.
• Shut up before someone punches you in the face.
• Don’t punch anyone in the face.
• Quit Facebook stalking people with the company’s computer.
• Increase your emotional intelligence.
• Learn that no means no — and don’t ask in the first place.
• Work hard.
• Be generous.
• Listen.
• Support.
• Don’t expect more than you’re willing to give.
• Assume good intent.
• Don’t take advantage of people who assume good intent.
• When you fail, admit it.
• When someone fails, don’t go ballistic.
• Spend money on a decent health care program.
• Stop being a control freak.
• Inspire.
• Champion.
• Be a decent human being.

Yeah. It’s pretty easy.

Go do it and kick HR to the curb.